He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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