i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
