so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
