You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
