Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
