OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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