It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
