Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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