I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize