omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
