my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Randomize
