It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
