I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Found the puke drawer
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
