No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
