Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
