WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize