so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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