he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
