the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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