Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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