So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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