I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
