Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
