I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize