Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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