I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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