I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
