Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize