Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
