He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize