Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize