Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
