There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
