you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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