WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
