Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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