Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Randomize
