i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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