The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
she smelled like a LAN party
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Randomize
