i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
