i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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