PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
