I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
