For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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