Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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