i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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