haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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