I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Randomize
