just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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