My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
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