God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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