Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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