U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
your room smells of hookers.
And success
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I love you. Go after that dick
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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